The Anthropomorphizer

For Christmas I was given a package containing sticker cartoon eyes and mouths that I can apply to the inanimate objects in my life. Although there are few objects I would consider doing this to, I did adhere a pair of glaring eyeballs to the slide scanner that sits on my desk. I have to admit that this slight alteration has completely transformed a rather unremarkable gadget into something that I am forced to acknowledge each time I sit at my work computer. Some part of my cave man brain refuses to allow me to ignore my new companion, forcing me to wonder, “Okay, what do you want from me?” I haven’t named him yet, but I am resigned to the fact that I am going to have to if I ever hope to get any rest.